What I’m Working On…

I haven’t even been close to anything crafty….well I take that back.  I did clean off the counter in the dining room.  This was HEAPED with cross stitch stuff that needed to be sorted and put away.  Blog readers had sent me things.  I have bought things.  All of it had been thrown on the counter and left.  None of it was important to me in May while Kramer was slowly leaving my life.  I wanted to spend all of my time with him.

Now it’s time to do those things that had been set aside.

After he passed…I had so many things that had been just left that needed attention…and many that still do.

Here’s the counter looking better.  I’ve yet to decorate this area.  It’s okay.  I have time.  At least I can see the top of the counter.

I kitted up two project once I have a little more time, I’ll be stitching these…
One is Farm Life from Little House Needleworks.  It’s hard for me to not love this one….we’ve lived a farm life for so long.  It seems so appropriate to stitch.

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This next one is the one I think I’ll start first.  It’s called Prairie Life by Heartstring Samplery.

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The saying on this says:
“The real things haven’t changed.  It is still best to be honest and truthful to be happy with simple pleasures and have courage when things go wrong.”

This is a VERY good saying for me in my current situation.  The sampler is inspired by the saying from Laura Ingalls Wilder.  I honestly don’t think I could pick a better saying to express how I really feel right now.  So..I think once things settle down, that this would be the PERFECT thing for me to stitch.

The other day Karl said to me, “Mom what would it take for you to go to the sewing room and sew?  I think you need to.”

I have so many other things right now that I want to tackle.  I want to fix the living room before the new furniture gets here.  I have some more outside jobs I want to tackle.  I want to wrap things up at the antique booth.

My kids have a special talent that they can sit in chaos and still do their hobby or watch television.  I just can’t truly relax unless things are a bit in order…by no means am I a neat freak or a cleany poo-poo girl.  I just can’t do chaos.

More than even I have a desire to finish some of the things Kramer wanted done.  I guess it’s my memorial to him…so that takes priority for me.  It’s my way of working through things I’m sure.

After reading all the notes and cards that people have sent me, I’ve learned so much.  People have talked or their husband’s passing or the passing of a loved one.  I have observed a couple things…

I think some people dealing want to hold onto the exact way of life that they had when their loved one was there.  They want the clothes to stay in the drawers.  They don’t want to paint as the color on the wall was one they picked together.  They don’t want to fix or change anything as that would require they pick some things on their own…then they are reminded the person is gone.

I’m pretty much the opposite right now.  Kramer and I had so many things that we planned for and wanted.  Now that he’s not here, I feel like it’s my job to carry on with the plans to make the house we dreamed of.  So I do…So I work to see some of those things happen.  For me, it I guess it still feels like our project..like our dream.

Everyone has said that people all deal with death a little differently.  It’s so true.  I see that even with our kids.

So this weekend Craig (who I think is dealing with death like I do) and I tackled the living room….I’ll tell you more about that in tonight’s post.

18 thoughts on “What I’m Working On…”

  1. Well, I am not a cleany poo-poo girl either! (What the heck is that, Jo? Did you make that up? Haven’t heard that before…and I love it!) I think that is so neat that you are working on things you planned with Kramer. Take care.

  2. Denise Briese

    I cannot believe you still do not have that furniture! Grief is so fiffetent for every single person. That is my favorite saying and so true

  3. I love the saying on that sampler—absolutely true. After my husband died, my family was concerned I didn’t return to quilting. I just wasn’t ready. I did cross stitch instead. It will be two years this Saturday since he passed, and I am doing so much better. And I am back to quilting!

  4. Judith Fairchild

    Oh I know the feeling of trying to relax or quilt with stuff piled up. For me it can’t be done. Especially in my quilting area I’ve tried it and I spend more time hunting for things than quilting. I’m Not a neatniik but when it comes to the real things of living it has to be and feel right. I’m so glad you are doing what is good for you to do. You and family are in my prayers.

  5. Carol Lorraine Stearns

    You are definitely a doer Jo! That counter piece is beautiful and probably was finished by Kramer! He was definitely handy. I am pretty much a slob when it comes to housecleaning. Too busy messing it up with fabric and other things. And yes, we all grieve in our own ways. Thanks for letting us in.

  6. Getting control of the chaos is just that, something you can control, so get er done Jo. Kramers death was not in his or your control, it goes its own path. I’m glad Karl is there to nudge you to sew or to do something that brings you joy and Craig being so helpful is also a blessing. One day at a time and one foot in front of the other.

  7. I think you are doing just exactly the things you need to do. You are making progress on your life and not sitting waiting for things to change. One step at a time, one foot in front of the other! One day you will look up and realize you have reached a new place.

  8. Donna Pheneger

    I agree with everyone else – this is your path and no one else’s, no matter how similar the circumstances. If it doesn’t work out, try it a different way or don’t do it at all and move on. Only you will be able to figure things out, with the love and prayers from family and friends.

  9. LaNan Eldridge

    You are handling your grief your way and that’s the only way to do it. My philosophy is cleaning can wait!!!! But I too can’t work in total chaos so my next project is to organize my sewing room!!!!! Take care!

  10. It is good to learn from you, Jo! I am quite the same way and it brings me peace to know you are dealing with it to your best ability! Life. Love. They goes on. Thank you! -Jean ❤

  11. Craig is a great son in law!!! I cannot sew with chaos either and would be doing exactly what you are doing. You will have plenty of time to sew later on.

  12. Yep, gotta do what works for you. At the same time, I think Karl was maybe honoring his dad by encouraging you to take time to do something you enjoy that fills you up. There’s a project going around Instagram where people are signing up to do something (whatever they choose) for 15 minutes a day for 100 days. I can see you’ve already mastered the concept of how much can be accomplished in 15 minute intervals. At the same time, maybe allowing yourself just 15 minutes of any kind of stitching at the end of the day after you’ve worked on some of those things you feel need to be done, would be a good balance of things? Just keep doing what feels right, bit by bit you’ll get it figured out.

  13. Jo, My Mom is a lot like you when she dealt with my Dad’s passing. I think it was within a week we cleaned out all his clothes and personal items. I asked her if she was sure she wanted to tackle that chore so soon after his passing. She said yes and it was her way of dealing.

  14. You are amazing Jo! I have to agree, I cannot craft, quilt or sew in chaos. I don’t have to have everything absolute clean, but I need some order to things. When I was going through a very difficult time in my life, the order in my house helped keep me sane. It was the one thing I could control in my life. I could make sure that my little tiny world was okay and that gave me a sense of calm.
    Big hug to you.

  15. When my children were little if I had 15 minutes to sew or clean I would always sew. After my husband died it was nearly two years before I began quilting again. I could sit and watch TV or be active cleaning and organizing but to concentrate and sew took a while to get back. Everyone is different though and recovers at their own pace and in their own way.

  16. Learning to do a hobby or craft amid the chaos in your house is a real TALENT! One that I have certainly been able to cultivate in my years of living the single life. Although I do feel a twinge of guilt when I see the dust bunnies move across the floor – then I sit down in my chair (where I can’t see them) and read a book – I highly recommend it!

  17. Susan the Farm Quilter

    I am so glad you and Kramer bought the house in town when you did…the timing was perfect in that you were able to get all the big projects done together and the smaller projects you had planned are those that you, with the rest of your family, are able to do. While you and Kramer were making your plans, God was obviously implementing His plan…His plan didn’t exactly fit with what your plans were, but He made sure you had a lovely home to live in and care for all the children entrusted to you daily. He obviously cares about the details of our lives.

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