First off…Thanks so much to all of you for the great support you’ve been showing our family. It is unbelievable. I am in awe. We all feel so loved.
I’ll catch you up on some of the details of the funeral with pictures and such over the next week or so. Yesterday I came out of the funeral fog and did a little try at entering the world again. I’d be lying if I didn’t say it had it’s ups and downs but I’d also be lying if I didn’t say it felt a little bit good.
During Kramer’s illness a lot of the things I needed got put on hold. I didn’t get my hair cut…I don’t think since Christmas. UGH. My childcare mom usually cuts it but I didn’t ask so we didn’t do it. I had bigger things to worry about. I also had a tooth that was suppose to get a crown. That didn’t happen either. Then from April into May it kept getting worse and I would pop a couple Tylenol and live with it. I didn’t say anything to anyone until Monday after Kramer passed away. I said something to one of the girls and the next thing I knew they had a dentist appointment for me for yesterday.
I thought the tooth problem was with a tooth I was told a year ago would likely need a crown. But I got to the dentist and realized that my tooth had quit hurting. After thinking about it, I realized my tooth hadn’t been hurting for most of the week.
My dentist was awesome. She knew Kramer had passed away. She gently talked to me and said she thought that I was likely grinding my teeth. She tested all of my teeth and couldn’t find where the pain was coming from. She explained to me that it’s typical for people under stress to grind their teeth and end up with discomfort. So I went from thinking the crown for tooth had to happen immediately to back on the “plan to get a crown” plan. I’m game for that. She did file a couple of my teeth down just a smidgen to see if that might help me but we’re waiting it out a bit for now.
Well…I didn’t think I was grinding my teeth a month ago…but I wouldn’t doubt I was. It has been quite the few months.
After the dentist I did some errands. There is stuff around the house that needs attention. I have weeds growing up in cracks…hoses that need replacing…all sorts of little stuff. I tried to tackle those things. I also did some simple stuff for me that had been neglected. I got a pair of sunglasses. My old ones were all scratched and giving me a headache from the scratches so I tossed them.
After I got back home I talked to Kalissa and we went the other direction to town. I had some things to do at the funeral home…and had errands for that direction.
Lora brought a house plant in this big watering pot planter. Kayla loved the plant…I love the planter so we split the two things up. I got the planter but needed plants for it so the nursery was another destination too.
We were gifted wind chimes so they needed a shepherd’s hook. We had gotten a gift certificate to the nursery so I was able to use that to get the things. We also were given a tree as a memorial and picked that out too.
When we got home Craig was getting off work so Kalissa and her family ate at my house.
After they went home I went outside to puz. We were given several outdoors plants as memorials. Kramer and I hadn’t planted anything on this side of the front porch. We were waiting for the right inspiration. Well…we were gifted several of my favorite plants….Bridal Wreath Spireas and Hydrangeas. They were the exact plants we were thinking of putting here so now…this is where they are going. Craig and I debated about how to landscape it and think something like this will work….
I’m running out of bricks from the ones I “saved” when the rectory here in town was demolished. I think there are enough for us to just make it work. I do have one brick piece put in the other landscaping we did along the front of the house that I could rob… It is fairly long if Craig thinks we need to adjust this.
I am super excited about the prospect of this. It would look so nice…
After that I decided to walk Ruby. I ended up on the road to the cemetery. I hadn’t been to the grave site since the funeral.
It was kind of hard. I didn’t think I’d even be a person that visits the cemetery. I’m not one that would sit and talk to my loved one but I found I might be one would just like the open space and quietness to remember.
Kramer’s grave is along the edge…closed to the crop land. He picked the spot.
Previous to this I thought I would wait before I picked a headstone. I’m not going to. I’m adding that to my to-do list for next week. It feels “not complete”…and it feels like I deserted him a bit without one there. Baby steps. It’s all baby steps here for awhile.
…then home we went.