Hubby…

When I saw a friend of mine in town the other day she commented that she enjoys reading the blog.  A smiled and tried to say thanks.  I am so bad at that.  I am just always dumbstruck when anyone compliments me that I forget to just say thank you.

Anyway-she went on to say that I never say anything bad about Hubby on the blog.  I thought about it and realized that it’s likely true.  I don’t say much bad about Hubby ever and if I do, it’s typically mild and it’s typically to one of the kids.  We all love him and it’s a safe place to vent.  Besides we all know there is WAY more to appreciate about him than there ever is to vent about.

So Hubby had a birthday on Sunday.  We don’t do anything fancy for birthday’s around here.  In Hubby’s words, “It’s just another day!”  But I thought I’d take a second to tell you a few things about him.

He’s child number 5 to a family of six.  The rest of the kids are all girls.  He started farming while he was still in high school.  Then continued on farming after graduation.  He’s always farmed some how.  It’s in his blood…a true farmer always.

He did become at EMT and later a volunteer fireman.  Those are both things he also loves.  He loves to help out when he can.

He hates getting his picture taken.  In his words, “stupid people annoy him”.  He has two beers when he gets home from work every night.  He loves sweets and desserts.  He delays going to the doctor if at all possible.

He, like me, love our work.  For both of us work is a hobby that makes up feel fulfilled.  Neither one of us like commercially type vacations.  We like simple time away where we can learn more about people or about things.  A couple weeks ago I was at the dollar store and he was waiting outside for me.  He struck up a conversation with some bikers and even after I got out of the store he continued to talk.  He likes to know where people are from and what brought them to where they are.  Many men would be frustrated with the wait…not Hubby.  He’d just nap if there was no one to chat with.

Hubby is plagued with feet problems.  He’s got very high arches and any shoes but his Red Wing farm boots can signal trouble for him.  So on days like our daughter’s wedding he wears the dress shoes for pictures and the ceremony then out come his Red Wings.  Some wives would be bothered.  Not me.  I’m thankful he’s smart enough to take care of himself and not be pressured by the social norms.


He doesn’t smile a lot…so the picture below really made me smile.


All week long before the wedding he’d intended on trimming his beard.  Each night was filled with some responsibility or he was sweaty and the trimmer won’t work then.  Finally on the Friday night he said to Kalissa do you want to try to cut it.  She didn’t care…I didn’t care either.  We love him like he is.  Again many women would be upset….not me.

If I ask, he will try to do anything for me.  If the house has been crazy and I’m behind he’ll do household chores…vacuuming, dishes, his own laundry.  He’s not real good at knowing that I need help but if I say anything he’ll gladly volunteer.

He wasn’t always so good.  He definitely didn’t come “trained”.  We went through our years with the “lid on the toilet”.  If I can logically explain anything to him he can jump on board including toilet seats.

We learned long ago in marriage that it’s easy to accept each other…faults and all…than it is to bicker.  There are times I wanted him to change, to forgive, to work less but then one day something clicked in my head.  I hate that he isn’t better at forgiving….  But he looks at it as standing up for what he believes…I like that.   At one time I wished that he wouldn’t still wear a shirt that an old girl friend gave him after we’d been married for 12 years…but I love that he’s frugal.  I often wish he wouldn’t work such long hours but I love that he provides for our family.

I’ve gotten so I call this the “double edged sword theory”.  There are many things he does that I don’t like…that I actually do like.  Times when he’s worked 100 hour work weeks for a couple weeks and finally quits early one night he’ll go to the volunteer fire department meeting rather than come home.  I feel frustrated but then I step back and remember that being dedicated and caring about others are exactly the qualities I love about him.  I lighten up and just make sure there is some food on the table for him when he gets here.  He is not slighting me-he’s doing what he believes is right.

We rarely fight.  I can say it’s honestly been about 5 times in the 29 years we’ve been married.  There’s just no reason to.  As long as we are acting like a team I’m happy and he’s happy too.

I’m so blessed that I have a great guy.  His good qualities far out weigh any bad ones.  He’s fun.  He’s silly.  He’s truthful.  He’s generous.  He’s soft to me, even though he looks gruff.  He’s devoted to his family..and especially devoted to me.  He’ll go the distance.  He’s strong in character.  He’s just what I needed in life.  I couldn’t ask for a better guy for me.

So…I guess I don’t say too many bad things about him.  I only hope that he celebrates many more birthdays and that I can be there for every single one of them.

16 thoughts on “Hubby…

  1. Keryn

    Some women complain about their hubbies as if it’s a hobby; I think it’s better to talk to him about what bugs you, not tell all your friends.
    As to the toilet seat issue, why shouldn’t guys complain more because they always have to lift the lid up? Such a tiny issue in a big world.

    Reply
  2. Ana Sweet

    And he is a good role model for your sons and daughters. Wonderful post and he could not have gotten a much better birthday present.

    Reply
  3. Deb

    Great post! I wish more marriages were like your’s – that is how it should be. True teamwork. I’m a lucky one too – I have a wonderful husband that does the little things every day and those are the things that count.

    Reply
  4. Myrna

    What a great tribute to your husband! I think you have a keeper there. He sounds so much like my husband that they could almost be brothers. My hubby is a life-long, hard working farmer too….and he has high arches and wears work shoes practically everywhere! LOL!

    Reply
  5. mary

    He’s a wonderful guy and you two are fortunate to have a partnership. It works and you accept him for what he is and don’t try to change. I think the people who are always complaining have no acceptance of another person’s view point, they want everyone to be like them. We celebrated 29 years last month and while there are tons of things about hubby that irk me I try and remember that he’s probably got a list on me too. And how can I ever complain about trivial little things after he drove me to Iowa to see you ?

    Reply
  6. Josie McRazie

    Did you write this post about your hubby or mine?? Other than a few differences this is my Honeyman also! Some days I think you and I are living very similar lives!!
    Sewing, child care, Sheesh! ;0)

    Reply
  7. Margie

    Lovely post. I read one that never has anything nice to say about her husband. I assume she thinks it is humor, and sometimes it is funny. I read her blog for the quilting and she has great recipes. Maybe one day she will say something nice about “the mister”.

    Reply
  8. Gloria

    What a wonderful tribute to your husband! I, too, have a great husband and he is has faults but so do I! We celebrated 55 years this summer.

    Reply
  9. Bonnie

    Loved this post. I have a “keeper” also. He made it possible for me to take care of my mother for 8 1/2 years. I stayed at her home and he stayed at our house, which is located on a corner of the farm. He retired a couple of years ago and had supper on the table every night when I got home from work for the 3 of us. When my mom came home from the hospital in June with Hospice care, he took the daytime hours and I the overnights. When things got worse, he stayed nights also. Mom wouldn’t have been able to stay at home without him. Now he is there helping me, an only child, deal with everything that has to be taken care of for the estate. We work well together. On a lighter note, he cuts all of my fabric for me and has made several denim quilts. Really don’t have anything bad to say about him. So nice to hear someone talk about their husband the way you do.

    Reply

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