Ask Jo: Viewer Comments

Every so often I get comments or email from readers asking questions or commenting.  I believe often times others would like to hear the questions and answers so I take time to answer them here on the blog.  Today is one of those days.

There were lots of people upset after a comment was written by a reader following my post on how I liked my kitchen and how thankful I was that I stuck to my guns and kept the long kitchen window.  I got a few personal notes from people concerned that the comment might have hurt my feelings.  Vikki writes: “I cringe every time I see a picture of your kitchen. I think it’s awful looking. Hubby and I have been in the home building/remodeling business for over 40 years and everything you put into your kitchen is exactly what we’ve taken out and replaced. Too bad we didn’t connect up–we could have saved you a ton on money!! LOL!! But, it’s your house and as long as you’re happy with it, well that’s all that counts. The outside of your house could be absolutely charming and beautiful with the right landscaping, but I can tell you and your hubby have already made up your minds, so I’ll leave out my two cents lol! It’s been interesting watching the progress on your home.  PS The poppyseed cake recipe was wonderful!”

kitchen-1

As far as this particular comment goes, I am taking it as a compliment.  If kitchens like mine are what is being ripped out of houses that are being remodeled then I hit my goal.  I wanted a kitchen that was old looking.

It is too bad that Vikki didn’t contact me earlier in our remodeling adventure.   We would have likely traveled her way and bought some of the cabinets from her as old southern fir cabinets are not easy to come by.  I’m hoping that Vikki and her husband have been carefully removing the cabinets and reselling them as I know there is a really good market out there for vintage cabinets and on top of that, it’s a great way to recycle.  Believe it or not there is a whole trend of retro, recycled, restorations happening.  We know.  We searched and searched for places to find these very things and found many.  We know and realize that retro antiques are not for everyone and frankly, we’re glad they are not.  It would have made our task of finding our goodies even harder.

Hubby and I have talked that we think we should have been born a generation earlier….we love the old.  We love buying quality in a limited quantity.   We love things simple and for us, that’s what our house represents.

Being a blogger, I open myself up for comments and opinions.  After all that is what a blog really is designed for- interactions between the author and the readers.  Being I have been doing this for awhile I have learned that some comments are really helpful and thought through while other comments are written by people who may be having a bad day or are written by people that don’t have the best written communication skills.  I choose to believe people aren’t mean.

I myself have been guilty of pushing the send button before I reread a comment thoroughly.  I myself have also been guilty of reading a comment with a different “tone” than the writer of the comment meant.

The final line is this.  I love my kitchen and house and could care less if a particular blog reader thinks it’s “cringe-worthy”.   I don’t think Vikki meant any harm in the comment.  She has commented before and I’ve taken her advice and weighed it along with all of the other advice I received.

I’m okay..my feelings weren’t hurt…and this is the least of the things that have been said to me because I blog…it’s a risk bloggers take and one I am willing to take because trust me,  thought through kind comments far out weigh the others.

P.S.  Vikki was right the poppy seed cake recipe is really good.  You can find the recipe here.

20 thoughts on “Ask Jo: Viewer Comments

  1. Jill Klop

    Thanks for the update on this. I was concerned for your feelings. Your comments show what a nice person you are. That comment bothered me all day. I even told my husband about it! This post made me smile and I’m glad to know you are OK…

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  2. Lorraine

    Apparently Vicki’s mother never taught her “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all”. I love your kitchen and the rest of the house. You saw potential in this home and made it your own. P.S. to Vicki: Writing “LOL” after every rude comment does not make it less hurtful to others.

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  3. Ana Sweet

    I really do love your house. Those reused cabinets and the island are perfect. I stopped watching HGTV when the told several couples to tear out perfectly useful and in good condition bathrooms and kitchens to “update” them just for looks. We had a 1939 house with a glass kitchen (glass walls and ceiling) and I am so glad it was not updated out of existence.

    The “decorators” also told couples to get rid of ceiling fans. We use ours to keep the AC off during nights to save resources.

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  4. Mary Jo

    I love your kitchen! It reminds me so much of my grandparents farm house. It’s a good thing that everybody has different tastes. It would be such a boring world if we all liked and had the same things! I am also impressed with how hard your family worked to make this house your house!

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  5. Joanne

    There’s a difference between having different taste and what the comment sounded like to me. Perhaps Vikki didn’t mean it that way but that’s sure how it came across. I’m glad you have thick skin. I do think one has to let things roll off their back if they are putting themselves out there but I don’t think I could do it. By the way, I made your banana muffins this week and they were wonderful. I’d definitely make them again.m I’ll have to check out the poppy seed cake.

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  6. Stacey

    You are my wonder woman and “oldest” bff! You married a great man and I admire you so greatly…..but not as much as I miss you! Your home and the family that gathers there are all beautiful!

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  7. Mary Jo

    Jo you and your husband were so smart to stick to your vision of what you wanted in a kitchen. We remodeled our kitchen several years ago with the help of a kitchen designer. The few things I wish I could change were her idea and I had to be convinced to go along. Although they aren’t bad, they’re not what I would choose if I could do it again.

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  8. Penny

    I, too was so upset by the comments made by Vicky. I thot they were so rude & hurtful that it hurt me to read such mean spirited comments. I was really concerned that those comments would hurt your feelings very much. I read them several times through out the day then decided that the comments were so off the wall that they must be an inside joke that I just wasn’t getting. Jo, you really are to be admired on your outlook & handling of different opinions. I certainly admire how you handled this!

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  9. Ann S

    Not too sure how Vikki has managed to stay in the ‘home building/remodeling business for over 40 years’ as she seems to have no appreciation of other people’s ideas or feelings. Personally I think your house is great and that’s just the point, it’s your house and it should be as you like it.

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  10. Mary Jo Boland

    This is a little off topic, but I was reading an older post that mentioned how you really liked Bundt cakes. I just bought this cookbook recently, and can heartily recommend it.
    “Bundt Cake Bliss: Delicious Desserts from Midwest Kitchens” by Susanna Short. It was published in 2007 and is available on Amazon. There are used copies available for as little as $3.66 (with 3.99 shipping). You might enjoy it.

    Reply
  11. Virtual Quilter

    I want Vicki to live somewhere in my state so I can source old furniture from her … and her comment that she could have saved you money just might have meant that she could have ‘found’ some interesting pieces for you!
    In my real world there are a lot of people who don’t like my style of furnishing, dressing etc … and say so, but I can also tell them that I don’t like their style. Friendships do not rely on us agreeing with each other on everything in our lives, but I enjoy the company of people who are honest enough to tell me if they don’t like something … providing they accept me telling them the same. The hard part is putting those words into social media without the advantage of being able to use a friendly tone of voice, a real smile and a good laugh about our different opinions.

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  12. Dawn

    The funny thing is that all of those kitchens being remodeled into what is the going thing today will one day be dated themselves. Having to keep up with the latest trends and styles is a big headache. Do what works for you in your home. Do what you like. Don’t try to squeeze your tastes into someone else’s box. And if someone’s taste doesn’t match your own, find something nice to say. Who is to say that one person’s taste is better than another’s?

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  13. Anna G

    From reading your blog, I know our tastes differ greatly. But I’ve read your remodeling posts because someday I’d love to remodel or build a house and it has been really interesting to see the progession, how long things have taken, troubles you have run into. It doesn’t matter that our tastes differ, it’s just great to get that second hand experience, so thank you for continuing to write, even if your tastes don’t match all of your readers’ tastes. And good on you for sticking to your guns and doing what works for you.

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  14. ShirlR

    When I saw the picture of your kitchen, I just loved the look of it. It’s just sweet, and I say sweet, because it immediately took me back to my newly-married days and a kitchen with red counter tops and a chrome kitchen dining set with a red formica top and the four chrome chairs with upholstered plastic (I think) red seats and backs. Your kitchen is so homey and welcoming. I love the dark cabinets and your floors. I do not follow current trends, I do what makes my heart happy, and I think you’ve accomplished that with your ktichen. Congrats!

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  15. Sandy N

    I’m a sooo happy you are happy with everything. I absolutely love reading your blog every day and I would hate it if any negative comments made you feel bad about any choices that you’ve made. I love that you love your house and that is the ONLY thing that matters!

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  16. Jean

    I love your kitchen. We bought our house around 30 years ago and the biggist attraction to me me was the 30s/40s kitchen was still there and it still is. It brings warmth and cheer to my heart. So many granite counters and stainless appliances are put in many houses now and they are lovely in newer houses. But we bought an old house because that was what we wanted and, like your house, feel so much would be lost to make it look all new. Life would be so dull if we all wanted the same thing.

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  17. Susan P

    Jo, you never cease to amaze me. What a kind and gentle soul you are. Wishing continued God’s blessings to you.

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  18. Judy

    Wow! you are pretty amazing not to get offended by the comment as I was offended just reading it and it’s not my kitchen. I think it is great that you did your kitchen your way and you got exactly what you wanted. Lorraine’s comment about the LOL made me laugh as it reminded me of people saying No offense before they proceeded to offend you with whatever comment they made.

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  19. gale

    I’m glad you’re doing what you want and love. I was almost caving to the posts on blogs about how outdated oak cabinets are and how horrible sheet vinyl flooring is and how cabinets should go to the ceiling, and how ugly ceiling fans are, etc. Those changes would have cost way too much so we had to keep all the “outdated” stuff but it turns out I love my kitchen and the rest of the house the way it ended up and I wouldn’t change a thing about it. I don’t understand why some think their way is the only way. I love how yours is coming together. Sounds like Vickie didn’t leave out her 2 cents after all.

    Reply

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