Every so often, questions and comments come from readers, and I think others would like to hear my response. That’s when I feature them on the
blog. This is one of those days.
I’ve had a few questions related to eating and my diet, along with being diabetic. In the past few weeks, I think I’ve gotten about four of them. I thought I would jump into that.
I’m going to take you back a little bit…Weight issues have always been a thing for me. I was never a thin girl. When I graduated from high school, I wasn’t “overweight” but did weigh about 160 pounds. I looked just fine…but I was in a class filled with thin girls…think size 1 or 3. At my size, a 10-12, I felt large. My brother often teased me for being large. It just happened that he took after our mom’s side of the family and I took after our Dad’s.
I graduated in 1984, so I’ve lived through the don’t-eat-eggs, fat is bad, and Atkins diet fabs. I’ve tried every diet known to man… California diet, Weight Watchers, Atkins, Fat Free, Cabbage, Mediterranean, and many others. I lost weight every time. I gained weight back every time. There really is nothing I haven’t tried. All of this made way for a bad relationship with food… and, quite frankly, my body image, too.
When Kramer died, I weighed in at my highest. 224. I knew I needed to lose some, but by now, I didn’t care. I was revolting against any diet. After all…what could a person believe?? I was told eggs were the devil when I was a teen, and now I was being told to embrace eggs for their protein. It was then I was told I was diabetic.
I knew I would be diabetic. I always struggled with my weight. My dad’s mom was diabetic. All five of her kids were diagnosed with type 2 diabetes…the last one diagnosed was 102 and skinny as a rail. It was coming for me, and finally it caught me.
After Kramer died, without trying or even realizing, I lost a lot of weight. Within a year, I lost about 40 pounds. I wasn’t cooking for him anymore. I was eating “girl dinners”. (Look the term up if you don’t know what that means) I couldn’t have cared less if I ate or what I ate. The only time I really ate was when the kids came.
Nowadays I’m right around 170. That’s 10 pounds higher than when I graduated. I’m still considered overweight. To be in a decent BMI range, I’d have to be at 150. I was that once…but as always, I gained it back. Right now, I finally have a decent relationship with food…I’ve come to realize some of you don’t think I do…why don’t I tell you about it?
The other day I wrote that Rick and I really only eat about once a day. What I mean by that is that we only have one real meal. By chance, we would likely fall into the category of intermittent fasting. That’s not because we chose that or are trying to adhere to that; it just comes naturally to both of us. Neither one of us is a big breakfast eater. We love breakfast food, but we just don’t eat it at breakfast. Typically, we eat something sometime in the day when we are actually hungry. For me, that seems to be around 1:30 – 2:30 in the afternoon. I “make” something for myself. It’s simple…a bowl of cottage cheese, an apple with peanut butter, two hard-boiled eggs, a leftover piece of pizza, a bowl of fresh tomatoes with cucumbers and Italian dressing on them. Something like that. Rick does the same. He’s more often a sandwich person or bowl of cereal person. It’s very informal when we eat. We eat on our own when our own bodies tell us to eat.
Later in the day, often at around 7 pm or so, we have a real meal. It’s usually protein-heavy. Rick has a habit of liking a “sweet treat” after his meal. Often that is as simple as a glass of chocolate milk. Often he has one, and I don’t.
Someone asked how eating once a day works with my blood sugar. It works just fine. Since I don’t weigh as much as I previously did, my diabetes isn’t nearly as hard to manage. My blood sugar is always a little too high…never too low. My A1C hovers around 6.2. My doctor is completely fine with that. I don’t get jittery or unstable. I did before I was diagnosed, but as long as I take my meds, I’m fine. The only time I get into trouble is when they prescribe steroids for me. Then it spikes to over 200. My diabetes is well controlled, so even those spikes due to steroids aren’t a big deal to my doctor. They are only temporary.
I’ve learned that I can control both my weight and my diabetes by watching my carbs. If I have cake, then no bun on my hamburger that day. If I make cinnamon rolls and I want to eat one, then no pasta that day. If I want pasta, I have more sauce and fewer noodles. I am constantly making little exchanges. It works for me. Most people around me can’t tell that I’m even doing that.
I have had notes from readers who think I should never have a sweet…you do you, girl. If that makes you happy and you can maintain it, go for it. I know I can’t maintain anything like that. I’ve tried, and I’ve gained it back, and of all things…that yoyo-ing is the worst for my body. I’ve also come to the point in my life that there is no “BAD” food.
I’ve had notes from people that tell me I should never have a sweet because that’s what’s feeding my cancer. Friends, if you don’t know by now, I’m a quality vs quantity girl. I don’t gorge myself on sweets…trust me…I don’t. If I live one day fewer because I ate a piece of cake one time, so be it. I enjoyed that cake. Whenever I had a sweet treat…trust me, I enjoy it, as I don’t eat sweets all the time.
I had a note from a blog reader saying they don’t see any fruits or veggies and no salmon (Girlfriend, I can’t afford salmon). It was a long note and listed out a lot of “healthy” things they never see me blog about. I have a couple of comments about that I’m hoping lots of you will get a better understanding of after you read this post. Keep in mind – Typically, I write one food-related entry per week.
1- When I write a blog post about a dessert we had, for instance, the cinnamon rolls from Fresh Peaches. That was the only sweet I made that week. I ate one. The day I ate one, I had no other bread product (Carb) of note. Of the whole batch I made, I ate one.
2- Rick and I both love baking and cooking. It’s a hobby we share. Recipes I share are part of that hobby. We have fun together, and if I eat one extra piece of something that’s not completely “healthy”, I don’t care.
3- If I make a pan of bars, it typically happens when all of the family is home. Trust me, there aren’t a lot of extras leftover, if any at all.
4- If I make something sweet and I try it, often times it’s a half of a bar, and that’s all I eat of the whole pan. In that half of a bar size, I can taste it and know if it’s good, and it’s enough to satisfy my sweet tooth.
5- I rarely blog about eating a peach or an apple or salad or anything that is considered healthy because there is no recipe needed for slicing an apple and eating it. You don’t see all of my healthy choices.
6- When I share a recipe, that takes no account of what I ate the rest of the week. Typically, what you see is my one treat. The rest of the meals are better choices. When I tell you about something I ate, it’s one thing. It should be compared to a whole week or even a month of food I ate. Right now, I’ve been eating tomatoes and sweet corn like it’s going out of style…That was never shown on the blog. Both are healthy choices.
Another thing I want to point out…We make a conscious effort to shop the outer walls of the grocery store. Think meat, dairy, produce. Most of our meat, I know exactly where it came from. For our beef, I even know what the animals were fed and what vaccinations they had. I likely even know one of the people who was part of the processing.
For the first time in all of my years, I have a decent relationship with food. Keep in mind, I remember strictly following the Atkins diet, and I cried the first time I ate a hamburger with a bun. Friends, that’s not a good place to be. I also remember forcing myself to walk on the treadmill for five miles and crying because I only had time to get four miles in. Yes, that all happened in my life. I’m sure many of you can relate. It is so common for women to have bad relationships with food and their bodies.
I am maintaining the lowest weight I have ever been at since I left high school. It’s the first time I have ever been at the same weight for more than a year. I no longer weigh myself daily and cringe when I’m a pound more. I don’t even weigh myself. I eat when I want, when I’m hungry, and I eat whatever I want. WHEW!! Sure, I keep carbs and diabetes in my mind, but it doesn’t control me. I can and do whatever I want when I want. It’s a beautiful way to live life. I wish I had discovered it long ago.
If we’re talking about overall health, I want to note: Food doesn’t cause me any anxiety whatsoever anymore. My weight and even my body image cause me zero anxiety. I’m not taking all the credit for that…that’s partly Rick too. If I even slip and start to say anything about my weight or body, Rick immediately kicks in and says, “Don’t go there. You’re great just the way you are.” Rick is awesome like that.
No…I’m not bothered that anyone said anything about my food choices, my diet, or my diabetes. I know it’s out of love and concern. I’m just super surprised anyone pays that much attention to me.
Answering the questions has been great for me. It has made me see how far I’ve come in learning to have a good relationship with food and loving my body as is…even with cancer and its many imperfections. I also realized how much anxiety in my life was caused by food. I am so thankful I finally found a spot in life where food and diet are something I am content with.
I hope this can give hope to any of you still out there trying to find peace with food and your body. You can figure it out. Just keep trying.
I can totally relate. Thank you, Jo. I love your saying: You do you. I love that you and Rick eat when you feel you need to. Psychology is such a big part of our relationship with food that people ignore the physical signs of hunger. It has taken a long time for me to stop eating something (usually something sweet) every time I returned home. That was a learned habit because when I came home from school my mother always had cookies, cake, brownies, etc. waiting for me. I’m free of that habit now. Jo, you keep doing you. It’s working for you.❤️
Thank you, Jo, for being so upfront and honest about you.
I’m 71 and still dealing with body issues. Yeah, I know…I’ve heard it all…just like you. My best weight was when I was in boot camp in ’82. About 150 I think though there were no scales there. ;-)
Through the years I gained, lost, gained…the battle continued.
Today I’m at 171 down from 210 and still losing. My dr put me on GLP’s. I’ve also heard it all but it’s what works and I want to live a long healthy life, how ever long that is.
No judgment from here – I get enough from family so I know how you feel. :-)
Love and prayers
Great post Jo. Thanks for sharing what’s working for you. It’s rough to be the chunky, curvy girl in a sea of pencil thin. We didn’t all inherit the thin genes.
Such a great, well thought out post, Jo! So happy for you and where you are in your beautiful life!!
Great sharing and insight on the mental health side of our physical bodies. I suspect the email comments come because, as you point out, food posts are the ‘carb heavy’ foods from the kitchen, not the fruit/veg/protein choices you make. I’ve wondered myself and as another woman who has battled her body all her life, kept my trap shut. Like you, I’ve come to peace with nutrition and my body at the lowest weight since 1981.
Happy Tuesday.
Good for you Jo !!
What people do or eat is up to them. It’s a case of please mind your own business – if you want to eat lettuce all day then eat lettuce all day – don’t tell people what you think they should do. Me, I realised I was in trouble a long while back. Managed to lose 42lb before it plateaud. Recently I changed my eating and what I was eating. I cut out sugar and I cut out carbs. I upped the protein. Lost 21 pounds since then. I still have at least 28lb to go before I’ll be really happy. I also intermittent fast. Just had my dinner and resting, I’m done eating for the day. I have only just found out that my gallbladder removal has affected what vitamins my stomach can take, so now I have an ox bile capsule because my own is just a drip drip, but not the whoosh that the gallbladder used to do to digest my food. Meh! So many side effects that I wasn’t informed about before the operation. In particular vitamin A is not being absorbed – especially with the meat, fish and eggs I eat, I should be doing well. Nope, dry eyes are a symptom – I was given drops by the optician a few months back. I felt tired all the time. Nobody mentioned lack of gallbladder! Such a nightmare, but now I’m hoping I have countered this. And no I’m not perfect – I eat home made ice cream usually chocolate, sometimes with honeycomb, sometimes with other flavours on Wednesdays as a treat. But I feel full and that is fine by me – I’m not tempted to snack and sometimes I will fast for a day or two. My husband eats anything and everything, chips, bread, cookies – he’s skinny – pffffft!
Yes Yes Yes…. society and sometimes ourselves think we need to live up to a certain standard of eating and appearance…acceptance of ourselves and figuring out what works best for us is monumental. Glad you are at peace with your diet and body image. Having a great support system, I call it a cheerleader, is fantastic!
Thanks, Jo. You are always candid about things, and you could have just told everyone MYOB! Women are too critical of their bodies. My daughter is lamenting her current shape after having a baby six months ago. I told her: your amazing body made, nurtured and delivered a human being and is now keeping that baby alive. (In my opinion, people are also way too critical about what OTHER PEOPLE are eating. There are so many reasons why someone needs to eat a food or can’t eat a certain food, and it’s all THEIR CHOICE.) Also, I don’t make a lot of sweets, but what do you think I have the most of in my recipes-to-try pile? Yep, sweets.
I love that about you Jo, you always look on the bright side of everything, you can spin any negative comment into a positive one. What a delight you are!
I admit “wondering” about foods you were showing us. I haven’t been able to stop my brain, yet! Lol! Your writing about many things is so often helpful and spot-on. Sending hugs and thanks!
I must of been in lala land for I never questioned what you were eating or making to share with us all. You are always so honest with us and I have never wondered about your food choices. Keep carrying on, I enjoy your blog and all the food recipes, quilting projects and family fun.
When I met you for the first time, at a retreat you had many years ago, first thing I was surprised was how tall you are. And how tall your girls are.So for a person of your height at 170 pounds, you are definitely OK in the weight range.
I’m going to be 81 soon and my husband and I eat similar to you and Rick. Our doctor is very pleased with how we eat, but now we do have a protein drink, especially him every day.
I have a friend who’s severely diabetic and she still eats sweets and she’s been around taking them shots for years now. I think people need to cool it about what other people eat, it’s really none of their business.
Well said! Of course we only see a very small part of your life so are in no position to make any judgements about anything you do. You are conscious about your health . I’m on a low sodium diet but that doesn’t mean I can’t occasionally have a potato chip. I just can’t eat the whole bag! Learning that a taste can be enough to satisfy is important.
I’m so glad you wrote this post, Jo. You have found a good spot that works well for you, and no one can really tell what that is, except maybe you and your doctor.
I was overwhelmed with advice about diet when I was diagnosed with MS, and it wore me out; I was already overwhelmed with dealing with symptoms. I knew folks were probably just trying to be helpful out of concern, but they didn’t realize how judgmental their “advice” became.
Now that my husband is diabetic and needs to adhere to a low oxalate diet to prevent kidney stones, I didn’t want him to feel like he was on the “ice cube diet,” as he likes to call it. We splurge here and there, but stick to real food, rather than processed, high carb stuff. That makes us so much happier, doesn’t really hurt our health, and we don’t feel exhausted dealing with food every day.
I’m glad you are enjoying your life.
Thanks for sharing all of that! I guess I just took your food mentions as being just what they are – a part of your life, not the whole! “You do you” is exactly right – what you and Rick are doing is right for the two of you. (People should focus on their own lives!)
You look just great in that recent picture1 It’s great that you have Rick to back you up.
Thank you, Jo! I’m not there yet (still thinking I should lose 20 pounds), but I really admire your take on food as a whole, and sweets in particular! If I were to deprive myself of all sweets, I’m sure I would go jump in the ocean.
I think people are now more relaxed about what and when we eat. I still eat three meals a day but I do not eat in-between meals. I am also diabetic and my glucose is usually under 100 in morning, so I am ready for a meal, breakfast. I usually stay away from breads, except toast for breakfast. I agree that we (diabetics) can have our sweets once in awhile. You are an active person and can handle some. BTW, fruits are not the best for a diabetic – some are better than others, but again, keep everything in perspective.
Anybody can see by the smile on your face you are happy. Whatever works for you and Rick on the eating plan – nobody has a right to criticize you. My hubs and I don’t eat three meals a day – we do eat salads and vegs most every day, but our share of sweets too. If what you’re doing is working I say go for it.
Good advice. Keep trying.
Good for you, Jo! Please don’t feel you owe ANYONE an explanation of what you eat or don’t eat. My goodness, don’t people have anything better to do than peer over someone’s shoulder to see what’s on their plate? What’s wrong with people?
I’ve had people talk about the sugar/cancer connection, and I hate it. I like your attitude towards it. If you feel like you want it, you could see if your insurance would cover a session with the dietician for medical nutrition therapy. I went before I had cancer surgery, and got some suggestions on vitamins for healing, how to get my protein in, etc. I’m not saying it’s a must do thing, but even as a nurse I learned several things that helped my recovery.
Jo, you are a healthy, happy woman. You must be doing something right. Thank you for sharing. I learned a couple things in your post today. I hope you are enjoying the fall that is dropping in on us. : )
People just amaze me! You take such good care of yourself, look at how you have handled your cancer and everything else that has come along! I’m a diabetic also and if I want a little sweet then I have it. I don’t eat the whole cake! You just keep being you! Hugs,
Oh my Lord! It is surprising that anyone feels it’s any of their business. You certainly handled it with grace, I admire you Jo! “you do you” is an appropriate sentiment.
I also hate the sugar/cancer connection.
It implies that somehow we can control our cancer. I’m pretty sure my second bout of cancer in 2026 was not because I had 6 alcoholic drinks, 10 slices of birthday/anniversary cake, and Christmas cookies in 2025. It is not possible to convince me that I got cancer because I ate dessert once or twice a month.
I don’t think folks can accept that bad stuff happens simply because bad stuff happens. Bad stuff has to happen because of a higher power, because of something we did or didn’t do for people to be OK with it. Why must we assign blame when we have a health crisis? Why is there a hint that somehow I deserve cancer because I was foolish enough to eat a couple of Christmas cookies daily from Christmas to New Years?
It is no one’s fault that I got cancer twice.
It is shocking at how little we know about cancer. We don’t know why I was in the 1-2% of folks that get a occurrence. It was not tattooed on my forehead at birth. We don’t know why it took 5 years for “an area of concern” to actually flip to cancer. (And the drs weren’t even concerned about the “area of concern”.) We don’t know why tamoxifen didn’t work for me. We don’t know when two siblings have the same cancer genetic mutation (and same parents), why only one sibling gets cancer and the other doesn’t. Why does one person live with metastatic breast cancer for like 15 years and Shannen Doherty die in a few years?
I will always say, I don’t regret my cancer. It’s made me a better, kinder person.