As many of you know I have a Facebook page associated with the blog. If you’re looking for it, just search Jo’s Country Junction on Facebook. Many people will read their Facebook feed and then see that there is a new post on the blog and then click it to come over and read the current post. Many people use it stay up to date with what is going on. Others use it to contact me or leave comments. This latest comment came from Jo’s Country Junction Facebook page.
Monica Thurn Walter wrote:
“I am regretfully no longer able to follow your posts. I cannot help promote what you are asking for regarding screening for smokers. Smoking is a choice, leads to an expensive addiction and that’s the risk you take. Two of my dear friends passed from “ non contributory” lung cancer. I will never get over their untimely deaths. They did not choose a habit that could prohibit them from watching their grandchildren grow up.
Thank you, Jo for many years of your enjoyable blog but I just can’t follow it anymore.”
That comment was written on July 14th at 6:43am.
Earlier that day at 6:04am our daughter, Kalissa, put a comment on Jo’s Country Junction Facebook page that said:
“This is the screening exam that should have caught dad’s lung cancer sooner and the same screening exam that caught dad’s lung cancer when it did. Please talk to the smoker in your life. After they’ve decided to not quit smoking we need to start screening them. Don’t shame them or give up on them. Be their advocate. You could save their life.”
Kalissa also put a link in to this Mayo Clinic article you can read HERE.
First off I want to say that if people choose to follow or not follow the blog matters not on drop to me. Everyone needs to take care of and manage their own life. I recently joined a Facebook group only to find that the group was SUPER active and my Facebook feed ended up overloaded with stuff from that group. It was too much for me and I left the group. I did what was right for me. I welcome everyone else to take on these same practices. If a group is too much for you for whatever reason, move on. No hard feeling from me whatsoever.
Second I want to say that it so saddens me to know that there are people who shame and blame smokers.
Kramer (my husband who died from lung cancer on June 2nd) and I never fought. We didn’t argue. We didn’t have spats….except when smoking was involved. Kramer would have been the first person to say that the only thing in his life he ever regretted was starting to smoke. He tried and tried to quit. I tried and tried to get him to quit. He tried every outlet there was to try to quit smoking. It never stuck. For the first 25 years of being married I nagged and pushed and pushed and nagged. That didn’t work either.
Then one day after fighting with Kramer for what became our last fight about smoking I looked in the mirror. I had lost and gained back the same 30 pounds I had lost and gained back time and time again. Over eating and carrying extra weight was not good for me. I was borderline diabetic but did I take it all seriously?…not really. So was I really any different than Kramer? My over eating and not taking my weight seriously was just as detrimental to me as his smoking was to him.
I finally decided…WHO AM I TO JUDGE? Addiction is addiction. Is one addition really so much worse than another? When I came upon that lightbulb moment everything changed for me. That was the very last day I fought with Kramer about smoking. Life went much better.
From that day on I made a commitment to not shame or blame smokers. We all have our addictions from the person who uses their cell phone over family, to the person with OCD, to the drug addict, to the gambler and so on. I will not blame or shame them either. I’ll look in the mirror first and judge my own person before I am off judging others.
Thirdly….this. So many people who have opinions that vary from others stop talking and quit. In this case, Monica, was upset that I want a recommendation to be standard for people who smoke to have a routine Chest CT scan. Monica is upset that she had friend die of lung cancer. Wouldn’t it be MUCH more prudent for her and I to work together and work to make it standard for EVERYONE to have a routine Chest CT scan?? In a move like that, we both win and together we have a more powerful voice with her advocating on her friends’ behalf and me advocating on my husband’s behalf. Think of how many cases of lung could be caught if Chest CT scans were offered at age 40…and every five years after that. Monica’s friends would have likely had their cases caught quicker. Kramer would have likely had his case caught quicker. It would have been a win for all of us….instead, we divide with fewer voices advocating against lung cancer. SAD.
I have no way to know if it was Monica…or who, but shortly after July 14th, when the comment came in, my Jo’s Country Junction Facebook page was “put in jail by Facebook”. Someone reported my Jo’s Country Junction page as abusing Facebook. I know of nothing I did. Is it coincidence that it happened right about the time Monica became angry? Is Monica the one who “reported” me for something. I don’t know and I honestly don’t even care. After a person goes through what I have for the last six months, petty stuff loses its sting.
Because of someone, maybe Monica, maybe not, reporting some imagined wrong doing to Facebook, the Jo’s Country Junction Facebook page is not working like it should. I am still posting twice a day. Please go to www.joscountryjunction.com to find me. Facebook prompts won’t be working…
Long story short:
-I thank Monica for bringing it to my attention that ALL people should have a Chest CT scan at an appropriate age.
-Monica, if you’re reading, I hope you can get past the anger stage of grieving. Your friends need you to advocate for them!
-I’m hoping whoever reported the unknown wrongdoing to Facebook can find a way to heal whatever is broken in them so they don’t lash out at others who aren’t quite as strong.